When people decide to quit, they have the best of intentions. I know I did. However, they often overlook the fact that they are dealing with a brain issue (how the brain has become dependent on the substance, or way of being), as well as the human psychology that comes along with that.
As such, there are many statements that addicts make to themselves, that while they seem positive, can be counter-productive as they put pressure on the person, as well as creating guilt. This is what I want to discuss in this article.
One of the biggest psychological obstacles to overcoming an addiction is the concept of forever ("stay clean forever"). Just thinking about this personal promise is scary and can create guilt. It is the ultimate commitment (forever), and it can make people give up in resignation that they will never win the battle with their addiction.
Anyone who has spent years taking substances or following patterns of destructive behaviour, knows the idea that they can never have or do that thing again seems like an overwhelming and unimaginable proposition.
For many addicts, the "forever" idea is linked with immediate failure, so why even keep trying to abstain? This is the issue that stops lots of people from quitting. I recommend that you don't say these words to yourself. So, what should you do instead?
Instead of thinking of being clean forever, just focus on staying free of the addiction just for today (whether it's drinking, drugs, sex or gambling).
Now you can centre all of your thoughts on the next 24 hours. Ask yourself if you want to be an addict today, or someone who gets to live free for one day.
Now you can promise yourself that you won't use today. That's all.
Focusing on the day, and just today, means you can maintain a positive mind-set from the moment you wake up until you fall asleep. The most important thing to remember is that it is gets easier the more that you do this. This is has been my experience, as well as that of many addicts I have known. Remember to keep a positive attitude during the day, as well as thinking about the things that are important to you.
It is also very important that you think of this strategy as living versus just existing. When under the forces of addiction, you just exist in the world, but there is no joy or vibrancy.
The forever concept is not effective, and it's counter-productive. The "one day at a time" strategy is manageable, and something human psychology can cope with and master with time.
http://www.OliverGreene.com website, tells the stories of addictions. It conveys the ideas and measures that were needed to overcome addictions of various types. His mental attitude and zest for life will inspire anyone in their own fight against addictions
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